SENSORY OVERLOAD

One of the common traits amongst aspies is the problem with sensory overload. I know this is one of those things that affects my social life in different ways. For me, the biggest issue is sound. It’s not just regular sounds i.e. people speaking or cars. Electronics and appliances drive me crazy. It has gotten to the point that one time I was watching tv and I couldn’t hear what was on the tv because I heard the hum of the tv. I can be sitting in a quiet setting and hear the tick of the clock and after a while, it begins to drive me crazy. My roommate has a fridge in his room and whenever I’m in there talking to him the noise it makes is like a nail on chalkboard. The garage door is incredibly loud. So loud that it notifies me of when someone is pulling in. It doesn’t drive me crazy, but it definitely startles me and is very loud, however, I was recently informed I’m the only one that ever hears it. That tripped me out because it’s so glaringly loud to me that I didn’t realize no one else heard it.

My sensitivity to sound also reaches into my social life. When I’m in large groups, I start to hear everything in the environment. This makes it hard to focus on people actually speaking to me. I begin to hear the electronics, utensils clinking, the music. It all just becomes unbearable. In the past I would just leave as soon as the environment begins to hurt me. Im learning that it’s not always appropriate to leave. I don’t want people to think I simply don’t like the environment, but to understand that it is actually overwhelming for me at times. So now I try to find a quiet space or simply go to the parking lot or something to decompress. This usually helps and allows me to not feel as uncomfortable as I normally would. One time, I was with a friend and his family and we went to see a movie. The plan, to my knowledge, was to go to the movies and then go home. This was the plan I was prepared for, but that plan changed to going to a movie and then going out to eat. It was such an abrupt change in plans that it immediately made me anxious. However, it was a night with people I like and care about so I didn’t put up a fight. In the restaurant, I immediately felt cold. There were a hundred fans in the place so not only was I cold, but I could hear all of the fans swirling. This made me physically uncomfortable. Then, as the people I was with carried on conversation, I couldn’t hear what they were saying. All I heard was noise plus the loud music playing in the restaurant. I just couldn’t concentrate on anything. To top it off, I began to hear the clattering of utensils all over the place. At this point, I just had to leave. The environment was just too overwhelming for me. It’s hard for me to explain to my friends why I suddenly get the urge to leave. I just suddenly become completely overwhelmed and it turns into fight or flight.

Food can also overwhelm the senses. I don’t even have to taste the food to be overwhelmed by it. Brightly colored foods like Cauliflower and Carrots are hard for me to even look at let alone eat. Foods with a thick texture are hard for me to eat as well. Thanksgiving is always a nightmare for me. I’ve found that most traditional thanksgiving foods I simply prefer not to eat. However, I’m socially aware enough to know that I have to pretend to like most of it when really I’m just there for ham and macaroni. I love ice cream, but things like cakes and cupcakes are hard for me to eat unless I have something like ice cream to soothe them down.